Honest, the Martian Ate Your Dog

HONEST, THE MARTIAN ATE YOUR DOG by Fahim Farook Copyright © Fahim Farook 2006 © 2006 by Fahim Farook All rights reserved. ISBN 978-955-50223-0-9 Dedicated to: My Parents for setting me on this road My wife for keeping me on this road Dickens, Dumas and Pratchett for showing me the road And above all, God, without whom there would be no road. Chapter 1 - Normal gets held up The world invariably worked the same way – one guy did all the work, another got all the money. Being held up was no different. It was tiring work, for the guy being held up. Where were the Cheese when you really needed them? Always arrive after the criminal had made off with the loot. Safe for them, but what about me, thought Normal. Normal shifted from foot to foot on the cracked macadam of the old highway. The crevices on the road mirrored the larger fissures in the landscape surrounding them – the devastation caused by bygone wars. "You should say, `Stand and deliver!`," he said, staring at the famous Dick Turpentine. Dick had not lived up to Normal`s expectations of a glamorous highwayman. He was a scruffy looking individual dressed in dusty clothes. The dust hid any distinguishing elements of style or colour in the clothes. The dirty brown bandana covering the lower part of his face muffled his voice as he spoke. "Huh?" said Dick. "When you hold people up, like you`re doing with me, instead of saying `Give me your credits!`, you should say `Stand and deliver!` or `Your credits or your life!` That`s much more highwayman-like," Normal explained patiently, schoolmarminess dripping from his every pore, as he switched from foot to foot again. [- 1 -] ... - tailieumienphi.vn