Xem mẫu
- K i e u dang quan ao ( h i n h thitc ket can) dai Chu trong be ngoai
dien cho ca t i n h va h a m y t a m ly nhif the nao,
\c veston vao t n t d n g hcJp p h i c h i n h thiJc,
dxidi day chiing toi se p h a n t i c h ky cho ban doc.
cho ngifcfi khac cam giac ngay ngan. T r o n g cuoc
- Bo veston song, ho t h i t d n g r a t chii t r o n g h i n h thitc, t i f duy
La loai ao quan dvfdc d u nhap t i f phiWng Icha n h i i each an mac cua ho. N h i f n g t i n h t i n h
Tay. Do tao h i n h cua veston c6 diicfng net hoat hdi m e m yeu, k h o n g quen xa giao.
b a t va k f u loat,. ngiidi mac vao to ra t i l n h i e n , Scf suat
phong do, khoe dep. Ngay nay, veston la le phuc
Ngrfc?i mac veston khong do n h u cau, cung
t h o n g d u n g m a n g t i e u chuan quoc te, n e u ai
khong v i thoai m a i , thifdng mac m o t each t u y
mac veston nhif t h i l d n g phuc, se c6 h a m y t a m
tien, ho t h i f d n g c6 t i n h each sd suat, l a m ban
l y n h i t sau :
vdi ho chang t h i i v i chut nao. V i ho thifdng mac
Tii minh cho la hem ngilcd ke s i i t o n t a i cua b a n , l a m theo y t h i c h m i n h .
V i bo veston la ao quan c h i n h thong va ddn
- Jacket
g i a n , gii3 difdc phong do k h i the. Cho nen, neu
mac veston nhvi thiicfng phuc, khong chiu thao Jacket de mac, c\i dong thoai m a i , c6 the
bo ca v a t d u cl t r i i d n g hdp nao, se la ngifdi m a n g che day cho k h o n g "my m a n " t r e n t h a n h i n h ,
t a m l y t i f cho m i n h hdn ngifcfi khac, va t i m moi khong m a n g m a u sac nghe nghiep, cho nen difdc
each de hdn ngiidi ve m o i mat. Xi^ sif k h a c6 moi ngvfdi y e u t h i c h . H a m y t a m l y ciia ngifdi
chap. thich mac Jacket n h i i sau :
Tinli tinh hoat bdt Tinh hba dong
Mac veston ma k h o n g t h a t ca v a t , neu khong Ho t h i f d n g hoat bat, k h o n g ken chon quan
CO t h o i quen luom t h u p m , t h i chac chan la ngifcJi ^ 0 , t h i c h n h a t la mac Jacket - giao d u vdi ho
boat bat, t h i c h giiip dd ke khac, diWc l a m ban khong can qua n g h i e m n g h i , ho t h i c h ban chuyen
\di ho t h a t v u i ve. thoai m a i .
106 107
- Theo duoi sit thodi mdi Site life sung man
Ho thich ca sii thoai mai ve an mac cung Tuoi tre thich do Jean, thiicJng c6 site life
nhif trong cuoc song. Ho thifcJng c6 site khoe gung man, hieu dong thich tranh dua, xi^ svf
tot. thieu muc dich chinh xac, thiidng hi tam trang
chi phoi.
Dau 6c linh hoat
- Ao pull
Da so ho CO dau 6c linh hoat, khong nhiJng
khong thii cilu, ma con luon c6 dau 6c tan tien. Ao pull la trang phue miia hh khoiig phan
Neu jacket diidc mac tren minh ngifcJi Idn tuoi, biet gidi tinh, tuoi tac, tang 16p, nghe nghiep...
y nghia tren c^ng ro ret. Nhieu ngildi rat thich mac ao pull, tinh each
ciia ho ra sao ?
TU do tan man
Thieu tap trung
Tit tin manh me, c6 tinh than tich cifc vvfcfn
len. Nhifng da so la ngiicJi t\i do tan man. Ho thiicfng to ra thieu tap trung trong viec
xa giao, va thich ke le viec cua minh. Thong
- Do Jean
thitcJng, ho CO tai an n6i. Muon hieu ho, ban
La trang phuc viicJt khoi khuon kho gi6i tinh, can c6 thai do chan thanh.
tii6i tac, tang Idp va nghe nghiep. Ham y dac
Khd ndng cong viec manh.
tnfng tinh each nhii sau :
Ho thitcfng c6 hieu suat cong viec cao, nhvtng
Tit tin
thiicJng vi thieu tap trung nen d§ lam phat long
Be ngoai dtfcJng nhit bay to sif hoa dong vdi mot so ngifcfi.
dam dong, thifc ra ho muon thong qua each an
- Quan dai
mac du khac v6i than phan, v i n tiem an mot
16ng tif tin manh. Khi ho da quyet dinh, thi Quan la trang phue phan than dif6i. La
kho c6 t h i sufa d6i. thil^ng phue thi khong c6 gi dang n6i. Nhvfng
108 109
- neu cac c6 mac no vao miia he ma khong chon Neu ca vat tif that r6ng va to, cho thay ho
jupe, ham y nhvi sau : |i£lu tinh cam, thich giao tiep. An phan thii
Hani muon diiac bieu hien "thitdng, \h phep. La ngvfdi tif tin.
Ho la ke manh trong cuoc song, mu6n nhd Sieng ndng
"each lap di" d i bay to sif khac biet v6i ngiicJi Neu til that ca vat vita phai, cho thay ho la
ta. Ho thiicJng kho tinh, vi luon cao hdn ngifcJi ngifcJi sieng nang can man.
khac, khong chiu tiep thu y kien.
Chi CO Icti ich tril&c mat
Che day ban than
Ngifdi mac ao sd mi trang, that c^ vat mau
Co mot s6 chi em vi khuyet diem tren than xanh nifdc bien dam, cho ngifdi ta cam giac
i h k (nhil bap ve qua to, long nhieu...) muon nhd phong do. Neu con tre la ngifdi tiJng trai ; neu
quan dai d i che day. Dong thdi ho muon giau 1^ nha doanh nghiep, hay coi chiing ho c6 khuynh
kfn the gidi noi tam. Hp tuy d6 ihig xi5 nhifng hitdng chi ham Idi tritdc mat.
thifdng khong chiu boc 16 tam sif vdi ngiidi khac.
2. M a u sac t r a n g phuc v a h a m y t d m l y :
- Ca vat
Ca vat la do trang site cho c6 ao khi mac Mau sac la nhan to quan trong tao nen an
veston, bat nguon tit chau Au. Cach that ca vat, tiftfng cho trang phuc, hinh thanh my cam trong
sii phoi mau vdi ao sd mi, c6 nhieu ham y tam mat doi phiWng. Trildc khi di vao phan tich cu
the moi quan he giila mau sac va tam ly, tinh
ly khac nhau :
each, tnMc bet xin gidi thieu mot so quan he
Long dq hep hoi giila cam giac mau sac, tinh cam v^ sii tiWng
Neu ho tif that ciic ca vat qua nho v^ qua trifng ciia mau sac.
chat, cho thay ho d6 sinh nghi ngcJ, c6 cam giac
Cam giac mau sac, chi sil cam nhan thi giac,
CO doc, keo kiet, c6 mac cam nang ne. tam ly, tinh than doi vdi mau sac. Chu yeu gom
Giau tinh cam 4 loai :
110
- ( M o t la cam n h a n cai nong cai l a n h : m a n ^vfcJc thay doi t i i y theo s i i khac n h a u ciia d a t
x a n h diidng, xanh la cay cho t a lien tilcing t d i jxiidc, k h u vifc d a n toe, v a n hoa. Nhif 5 T r u n g
ban trcJi va bien ca, tao nen cam giac l a n h , goi Quoc, m a u do cho cam giac soi noi, t i i d n g t r i l n g
la m a n l a n h . M a n do, cam, vang d l lien tifclng cho s i l v u i mvfng ; m a u v a n g cho cam giac d i u
tdi m a t trcJi va luEa do, tao nen cam giac nong, d^ng, tifdng t r i f n g cho h y vong ; m a u t i m cho
goi l a m a n a m . M a n xanh la cay va t i m lien cam giac nho n h a , tifdng t n l n g cao quy ; m a n
tiicing t d i thifc v a t , hoa..., la m a n t r u n g t i n h . den cho cam gidc n g h i e m tiic t i i d n g t r i f n g t r a n g
H a i l a cam giac nang nhe : m a n c6 do sang trong ; m a u t r a n g cam giac sach se, tifdng t r i l n g
cao tao cam giac nhe, m a n c6 do sang f t tao sil t r o n g t r a n g ; m a u v a n g a n h , bac a n h cho
cam giac nang. Cho nen, quan, jupe nen c6 m a n cam giac hoa le, t i l d n g t r i l n g cao qui...
d a m hdn ao, de giilf s i i t r a n g trong, viJng chac.
- M a u do
Ba la cam giac tien l u i va gian n i t : m a u
N h i i n g ngilSi thfch t r a n g phuc m a u do, h ^ m
sang, do t h u a n cao va m a u a m tao cam giac
y t a m l y n h i l sau :
t i e n , t r o n g do m a u t r a n g m a n h n h a t ; m a u c6
do sang, do t h u a n thap va m a u l a n h tao cam ong xdo kien citcfng
Wn
giac l u i v a co r i i t , t r o n g do m ^ u den m a n h nhat.
Ho l a ke m a n h t r o n g cuoc song, t h i c h the
Bon 1^ do citng m e m : m ^ u c6 do sdng va
thao, t i l de cao. D i l l a m viec g i deu v d i t i n h
do t h u a n t r u n g b i n h tao cam giac m e m m a i , on
than xong xao v ^ k i e n cilcfng.
h6a ; m a u c6 do sang thap va do t h u a n cao
hoac t h a p , tao cam giac ciing coi, nghiem tiic. 2c quan
T i n h cam va sif tifdng t n f n g cua m ^ u sac T h o n g thiicfng n g i l d i t h i c h m a u do g i ^ u t i n h
chi n h i i n g cam t i n h difdc nay sinh do m a u sac, liic, h i e u t h a n g , k h o n g hep h 6 i trong cong viec
va y nghia dac t n f n g ma ngifcfi t a d a t cho tvfng Cling nhif t r o n g cuoc song. T i n h cam hoc 16 r a
loai m^u. T i n h cam va y nghia tifdng t n i n g do ngoai.
112
- Nhiet tinh ra tram uat. Neu gap phai chuyen dau thifdng,
Dan ong thich mau do, thifdng la ngifdi thii rat kho giai bay cho vcJi n6i niem.
vi. Ho giao tiep rong, nhifng doi khi qua phong - Mau hiicTng (hong)
tiing. Ho la ngifdi nhiet tinh va rat manh dan.
Cii chi nho nha
Than kinh suy nhilcfc
Dan ba thich m^u hifdng, thifdng c6 cxi chi
i t nhieu c6 chiit than kinh suy nhifdc d6i ^ h o nha, t i n h tinh cdi mcf, hay giiip ngifcJi khac,
vdi nhiJng ngifdi thifdng mac mau do, mong CO giao due.
mifdn mau nong choi hoc lu!a c6 the bu dap cho
Mang tani ly tre trung
sii thieu sot nao do ciia minh.
^ Da so ho la nhiJng c6 gai dep, nen thifcfng
- Mau do tim
tam ly tre trung.
Thieu binh tinh
Tinh cam te nhi
Ho thifdng khong the nhin thang ban than
Ngifdi thich mau hifcfng c6 ea tinh diu dang,
mot each khach quan va binh tinh, de thoa man,
cung de that vong, thifcfng i t kien t r i cho mot giau long bao dung thifdng ngifcli.
viec. - Mau cam
Til cao til dqi Tinh tinh hoqt bat
D^n ong thich mau t i m thiidng t i i cao i\i Ho thifcfng chon mau cam k h i khong the
dai. Ho nhiet tinh, nhiing gioi che giau, rat song CO doc, ho giau tinh hai hifdc.
nhanh nhay, tham tram, kin dao.
Hung bien ccfi met
Kho hieu
Ho thifcfng gioi an noi, thich bien luan vdi
Loai ngitdi nay thifdng kho hieu, kho yeu ngifcJi khac, nhifng dieu nay khong he can trd
ngitcJi khac. Doi khi ho khong gian, nhifng to sit cif xilf on hoa vdi moi ngifdi.
114 115
- - Mau trang
Thich xu ninh
Day la m a u k h o n g k h u y e t diem. H a m y nhif
La ngilcJi lac quan, t h i c h ket ban, n h i f n g ho
sau :
l a i t h i c h x u n i n h hcfn. Ho nhiet t i n h vdi ban
m d i quen, n h i l n g khong bao l a u l a i chuyen sang Jft Thieu tinh cam manh liet
>
b a n mdi khac. Ho thifcJng k e m phong p h i i ve t i n h cam,
- Mau vang thieu quyet doan, va t h i e u t i n h thiic te.
Til bieu Men KS theo chu nghia thitc te
p h a m c h i i v d i cong viec m o t each can m i n .
N h f i n g ngii^i t h i c h m a u VElng thiicJng c6 t r i
tue. Ho chon m a u v^ng v i m u o n bieu hien ban Co. tinh ngay thang
t h a n luon c6 t a m hon cao t h i i d n g . T u y CO ngifcJi k h o n g doi hoi gi k h i chon m a u ,
Canh gidc nhifng neu ho t h i c h m a u t r a n g n h i e u hdn, cho
thay ho c6 ca t i n h hon nhien ngay t h a n g .
Ho t h i i d n g de phong ngiiSi khac, khong
giao tiep. Thieu quyet doan
Giau tinh than mqo hiem •
Co mot so ngifdi v i k h o n g biet nen chon m a u
nao m d i chon lay m a n t r a n g , n o i len ho t h i e u
Ho k h o n g sd kho k h a n , khong thoa m a n hien
quyet doan k h i x i i l y v a n de.
t r a n g . N e u la n i f , t h i k h o n g thao xa giao. N h i f n g
ho l a i mong chiem difcJc n h i e u cam t i n h ciia ^ • | | G m u kin ban than
ngifdi khac.
•T^ K h o n g m u o n hoc 16 suy n g h i noi t a m v d i
Thich chui vao cho be tac ngifdi khac. Qui tac song la d§ dai v d i i n i n h ,
I p d i a t khe v d i ngildi khac. Ho t u y l a m ra ve
Ho t h i f d n g CO ly tifclng cao xa, t h i c h cau toan,
t h u a n hoa, n h i t n g noi t a m lu6n chita difng y
cam t i n h i t hoc 16. N h i f n g t h i c h nghien ci!u
jhia phan k h a n g .
nhiJng v a n de k i e u sijfng t r a u .
117
116
- - Mau xanh niidc bien " giong nhau. Nhifng, cung c6 mot so quy tac
Chi cong vd til jiiang tinh pho bien.
Vi du : Khi mot ben noi, t h i ben kia phai
La ngifdi d§ c\i xii, ho kioii chi cong v6 tif, lang nghe ; khong nen lam gian doan cau chuyen
la ngifdi trung thanh vdi cong viec, ho c6 the ^6i phiWng ; chi c6 mot ngifcJi noi trong mot
lam rat lau tai mot sd lam, gianh diWc thien thcfi gian nhat dinh ; khi mot ngifdi muon noi,
cam ciia ban dong nghiep. Nhilng do thieu site phai chd ngifdi khac noi xong ; phai chu y dung
phan dau viWn len, nen kho dat tdi chitc vu ttf nho nha...
cao.
Khi hieu nhau qua ngon ngfl, can ci? nhu
Cuoc song dam bac cau cua noi dung va t i n h huong, doi ben can
tuan theo mot so qui tac dac t h u , v i du : K h i
Ho khong muon pha vd thoi quen song binh van dong vien cci quoc te gidi thieu kien thifc
thifcfng ciia minh. Ho cung thich ban luan ve mon cd vdi ngifdi ngoai cuoc, nen tranh si5 dung
ke khac, hoac tdi quan rifdu gan do ciing pha qua nhieu tif thuat ngii, ma nen dung ngon ngfl
tro vdi ban be. thong dung hdn.
Tim hieu qua ngon ngi3 c6 tdc dung dac biet
3. H a m y t d m l y q u a \6\i :
trong giao tiep, ma cac hinh thiic t i m hieu khac
kho thay t h I . Vi thong qua sii t i m hieu sau sac
Ngon ngit la phiWng tien chii yen cho giao toan dien, c6 th§ biet diWc tam ly, dao ditc, tinh
tiep giifa ngitcfi va ngiicfi. Tim h i i u vdi nhau each, kha nang va sii t u diidng cua doi phifdng.
bang ngon ngil phai tuan theo nhitng quy tac
I - "Chao ban"
nhat dinh. Va nhitng quy tac do thong thifcJng
la sif an y bat thanh van. Qui tac tro chuyen 1 Dau 6c tinh tdo
cl nhvlng ndi mang tinh xa hoi, van hoa, doan W Thich dung cau chao hoi nay, la ngifdi c6
the, nghe nghiep khac nhau, se c6 sif khong dau 6c tinh tao, sieng nang can m i n , nghiem
118 119
- tuc, t h a m chi c6 c h i i t bao t h i i . Thong thvfdng, noi. NgifcJi t h i c h dung " t o i " thvfdng xuyen c6
ho c6 the k i e m che t i n h cam ban t h a n , khong ham y t a m ly n h i l sau :
to r a k i n h ngac ve nhUng chuyen nho trong
Harn muon tit biiu hien
cong viec va cuoc song. Ho t h i i d n g dildc ban be
t i n nhiem. « Gia s\i d6i phitdng luon mieng nhac t d i chrf
"toi" t r o n g m o i cau n o i , n h i t "toi cho rang...",
- "Hello !" ||pt6i cam thay...", "toi n g h i t h i . . . " v.v t u y la t h o i
Vui tiicfi hoqt bat quen ngon ngU, n h i t n g thvfc chat m u o n gay an
tvfdng sau n d i ke khac. Be m a t ho to ra r a t t i i
T h i c h chao ngifdi khac bang cau "Hello", cho
t i n , t h i l c ra t r o n g long r a t yeu mem.
t h a y t i n h each ho v u i tvfdi boat bdt, t i n h liic
sung tiic, ngay thang, giau t i n h sang tao, dau Cam gidc an toan trong hien thitc cuoc song
6c n h a n h nhay, c6 t i n h h ^ i hifdc b ^ m sinh. Ho Day la t a m ly dildc h i n h t h a n h d t h d i t h d
mong m u o n dvfdc ngiicli ta ngif3ng mo, dong thcJi au, (c6) cau be m u o n xoa d i srf bat an k h i b i
l a i c h i u nghe y k i e n khac nhau. uy hiep, thtfcfng dat m i n h la t r u n g t a m , ba me
- "Nay" 1^ ngilcJi cho be cam giac an toan. De gay stf
chii y ciia me, be n h d lay tvt "toi". Cho nen, c6
E then mac c&
mot so ngiicJi l u o n lap l a i tH " t o i " de g i a n h lay
Giong nho nhe : To ra n h i e t t i n h , gianh diidc cam giac an toan, dan dan, h i n h t h a i y thitc do
t h i e n cam \di ngifcfi khac, nhvfng do ca t i n h e se chon sau vao ngon ngiJ t r o n g cuoc song h i e n
t h e n , nen khong dam d i t h e m mot bifdc. Thong thitc.
I
thiiclng hp e then mac cd, da sku da cam. Giong
Khang dinh sit ton tqi cua minh
n h a n : L a i to ra trong long dang biic boi.
Ngitdi 16n t h i t d n g noi " t o i " t r o n g cuoc song,
- 'Toi" ong dem t i n h cam xa hoa, t i t p h u cua m i n h
Day la dai t i t n h a n m a n h sii tif y thitc, qua i r u y e n d a t t d i doi phitdng, de doi phitdng xac
t a n so ST3 d u n g c6 the n h i n t h a y t a m ly ngiicfi d i n h sit t o n t a i ciia ho. C h i c6 n h i t vay, ho m d i
120 121
- CO cam giac an toan. Khi cif xi3 wdi loai ngifcJi - " l / " , "cai nay"
nay, difng bao gid bo quen sit hien hilfu cua ho,
Khi noi litng chitng, chiing toi thich dung
vi ho CO trai t i m nhay cam, bat ky ni chi cua
nhitng than tit, lien tit dai loai nhit "it", "cai
ban deu ban sau An tifdng ndi ho.
nky'\i kia"... de noi tiep cac Idi ngat quang.
, - "Chiing toi" jsjeii s\i dung cac tit noi tren thitcJng xuyen, c6
"Chiing toi" la dai tijf nhan xvfng bao goni h^ni y tam ly nhit sau :
ca ban than minh. Ngitdi chong diing tit "chiing
Go bo va chiu site ep
toi" CO ham y tam ly nhif sau :
Khi CO bet siic tap trung siiy nghi, Idi noi
Thieu cd tinh
tit nhien bi gian doan. Day la do tam trang
La ngifcfi song lang le, thuoc loai an phan hoac tit dung qua cang thang ma ra. De noi lai
va theo duoi ngifdi khac. cac cau rcJi rac, tat yen phai can tdi cac tit tren.
S(f bi ton thit(Mg Kiem che tam trang bat an
Co ngitdi thich dung tvi "chiing toi" vi sd qua
Thong thitdng, trong so nhitng ngitdi siif dung
noi bat de chiu sit ton thitdng. Ho noi "chiing
tit ngit tren, da so dang trong tam trang bat
toi" ma ham y la "toi", lam nhif vay nham cit
an vi nhieu viec phitc tap, kho khan chita the
xi^ cho linh boat, tit bieu hien vifa phai.
giai quyet.
Noi gan tinh cam
Ij Thieu til tin
Co ngitdi thich dung t i i "chiing toi" dh that
chat quan he giita hai ben, nhat la khi ngitdi W Co ngitdi k h i de xuat y kieii va chii tntdng,
CO dia vi thap noi vdi ke khac c6 dia vi cao hdn, sd khong ditdc thong qua, nen nhd tdi cac tit
muon cho ngitcJi khac mot cam giac lam titSng, tren dg lien ket Idi noi. Cac tit do thitdng ditdc
de ngifcJi nghe c6 cam giac than mat. ^p dung k h i noi hoac khi doi thoai.
122 123
- Thong cam do lUOng
- Thich ke chuyen cu
Doi khi, doi phiWng thifcfng noi "if", "hilt"...
khi ban thao thao vdi ho, diing tiidng do la sit Co so ngifdi thich ke lai nhiing cau chuyen
tan dong, that ra nhieu liic chi la mot le phep da qua. Ham y tam ly thildng la :
xa giao, hoac thong cam do liidng vdi ban. Tani ly trong rong
- Noi k i l u "Chuon chuon dap nirfdc" Neu nhif ho titng la ke thanh cong trong
Titc la noi qua loa v^i cau, vdi nhilfng de tai cuoc song va sif nghiep, ho cit chon nhiJng chu
xa giao, binh thiidng nhat. Ham y nhif sau : de hoi i!c va nhd nhung, cho thay hien nay dang
of tam trang trong rdng, day chi la mot each t i l
Khong dinh noi tiep
an ui khi luon bat man vdi hien thiic cuoc song.
Cach tro chuyen nhii V£iy, tuy khong lien
quan tdi chuyen rieng ca nhan, cung khong c6 Den bil tam trang that y
y nghia Idn lao. Neu doi phildng khong phai Ian Neu ho khong phai ke thanh cong triidc kia,
dau gap ban, ma lai c6 each noi qua loa nhif chon cau chuyen v6 vi nhif vay, cho thay ho
kieu "chuon chuon dap nilcic", thi dieu do noi dang lam vao hoan canh khong thich ilng. Ho
len han khong dinh tro chuyen tiep vdi ban. mong qua cau chuyen xiia ma quen di thiie te,
- Noi "trang giang dai hai" de han gan that y trong long.
Thiicfng chi di sau van de khi doi ben tim - Noi thao thao bat tuyet
diWc scf thich chung.
Co ngiidi noi thao thao bat tuyet trong khi
To ve thich thu xa giao. Ham y nhif sau :
Neu doi phifdng eo phan hoi khi nghe can Kem ndng litc trong thilc te
noi trang giang dai hai ciia ban, cho thay hp
Ho chi noi gioi ngoai mieng, kha nang cong
mong ban sau vdi ban ve van de do, dong thdi
vice rat xoang. Dae tning tinh each ciia ho la
noi len doi phiftfng thich thii ban.
noi nhieu lam it, gioi thoai thac trdch nhiem.
124
125
- N6i thao thao chi de che day sxi kem coi thife chuyen tot xau ban than, khong he giau giem
te. gii thieu sot ciia minh, ham y tarn ly nhif sau :
- V u n g ve it noi Mang muc dich icri Idc
NhiTng ngifcJi khong kheo noi, chita chac la
Ho khong phai la ngifcJi thanh thiic ngay
ke bat tai. ThitcJng thi c6 nhitng kha nang nhif
thang, vi each vach ao cho ngifdi khac xem lifng
sau :
cua hp thifdng mang muc dich dem lai Idi Ipc.
Kheo thong cam
De thay long doi dci
Ho tuyet doi khong an noi de khien d6i
phitdng kho xi3.
Ho thifdng thieu kien nhan, de thay long
Ngay thang ;6i da, hdn nila long da hep h6i, thifcJng trcf
mat vdi ban chi vi chuyen con con. K h i xa giao
Ho thiidng CO ditc tinh IcJi noi di doi vdi viec
n coi chiJng thai do chan tinh cua loai ngifcfi
lam. C a tinh thang than.
Co nang litc
- H i ha
Ho CO nang life cong viec manh.
Ddng tin cay Nhflng ai du bi noi ve van de gi, deu doi
pho bang thai do hi ha, dil khi hi phe binh hoac
Ho lam viec dang hoang c6 ke hoach, la
SI nhuc, v I n xi^ sil vdi thai do c6 ve v6 til. H a m
ngifdi dang tin cay. y nhil sau :
- Noi xau, noi tot
Gian xao
Neu nhflng ai thich noi xau, noi tot ngiicJi
khac cho thay ho la ngifdi thich "dam bi thoc Neu nhil ho khong phai mat day thi chac la
choc bi gao". Nhilng neu ngiic/i do noi luon ke gian xao.
127
- Bac nghia bac tinh Khong tien noi ro t
Loai ngrlcJi nay tuyet doi khong the la ngifcJi "Toi nghe ngifcfi khac kl..." That ra, ngifdi
lanh dao, eon mot kha nang khac, ho la ke bac khac do chinh la ngvfdi noi, vi han khong tien
tinh bac nghia, phai coi ehijfng hanh dong lat n6i ro suy nghi cua minh nen mildn "ngiidi khac"
long. dl noi.
- Khoe khoang
"Tuy anh ay noi c6 ly, nhifng toi khong tan
th^nh...", that ra han dang rat tan thanh.
Dae diem de nhan 1^ ho thtfdng noi khoac Trong qua trinh tim hieu nhau, neu khong
lac, to ve oai ve phan tich ky cau noi ba phai tren, thi kho 16ng
Ham muon vat chat phu hoa nhan biet y nghia muc dich thiic sii ciia doi
phifcfng.
Day la loai tieu nhan ehinh cong, ho thildng - Noi quanh v a n de " t i n h due"
rat ham muon hiicfng thu vat chat, nhiing lai
thieu tinh than trach nhiem. Neu l^m viec diidi Co ngiidi thich noi nhu!ng chuyen lien quan
tnfdng cua ho, ehd nen qua noi bat, vi ho khong tdi "tinh due" triidc dam dong, con mot so n^ildi
muon thuoe cap gioi hcfn hp. khac lai rat ngai noi tdi van de do ndi cong
c6ng, phai nhin hai loai ngiidi tren nhil the
- B a phai nao ?
IChi giao tiep, tuy ta c6 the qua Idi n6i ma Che giau sU mac cam
tim hieu noi tam doi phifdng, nhvf tfnh chan, Neu ban mot each cong khai, chi vi muon
that ciia Idi noi doi phvfdng nhif the nao ? Nhat miWn nhflng Idi tho tuc kia che giau sii mac
1^ nhflng cau ba phai ciia ho, nen phan tich ra cam tren phiWng dien "tinh due" ciia minh. Co
sao ? Nhfing cau ba phai, thildng tiicfng tning s6 ngifdi to ve khong lia ban tdi chuyen "tinh
h^m ^ nhvf sau : due" th^c ra ho kha quan tam van de d6. Thong
128 129
- thifcfng, nhttng ngifcJi c6 hoc khong chiu b^n ^,1^ nen diing rat nhieu IcJi ll do. Ham y cu the
cong khai, nen da lai can chuyen sang sii viec jihii sau :
khac.
Tdc dung che giau
Nghi va noi trdi v&i nhau
NhiJng ngildi dan ong ngoai mieng noi rang Co ngildi vi muon che day hanh vi cong kich
"trinh tiet la chuyen 16i thdi", that ra khong ciia minh, da khcli dong tam ly phan tac dung,
dung nhvf ho nghi, cang noi cao giong ve van to ra khiem nhitc/ng cung kinh v6 ciing, si^ dung
de do, cang cho biet trong long ho rat mong ban qua nhieu Idi noi kinh men, khi ay ho thifc sil
gai gifl diidc trinh tiet. mang ham muon tan cong manh liet. Lcfi noi
kinh ne ngo^i mieng cua ho khien ban kho
- L d i k i n h trong
chiu...
La nhtJng l(Ji to ve kinh trong, le phep. Trong
xa giao, c6 the can ci! so lifdng Idi noi kinh Nay sinh trb ngai
trong, ma doan biet dia vi xa hoi ngiJdi do.
Thifc ra, khi moi quan he chifa 5 mitc than
Thong thifcJng, nhiing tang Idp tren vi trinh mat hoac giao tiep vdi nhiJng doi titdng khong
do van hoa cao, quen dung IcJi noi kinh trong, quan trong, thi le ra khong can tdi Idi kinh
con tang Idp thap vi hoc thiJc han che, nen quen men. Neu doi phtfdng dot nhien sii dung Idi
dung IcJi que mua hdn. kinh ne khi ban quen than vdi han, c6 nghia
Nhrfng ngifcfi c6 tinh each phuc tiing, thiidng 1^ giita hai ngifdi da phat sinh van de trCI ngai.
d^ng Idi le do noi theo kieu bi dong, theo duoi
khong suy xet. NgifcJi c6 tinh each quyen liic Lam tang khodng each tam ly
thi it dung Idi 1^ do hdn.
Khi tro chuyen neu v6 y siS dung tdi Idi kinh
Nhving ngifdi hanh nghe thiicfng nghiep, dich men c6 thg khing dinh doi ben da nay sinh
vu, vi muon d\idc long doi phildng, diidc vu lam khoang each tam ly.
130
- Chqy theo mo-den
Khinh miet vd canh gidc
Ho thifdng t h i c h chay theo mo-den, t h i e u
K h i gidi niT svi dung qua n h i e u Icfi k i n h men
ghu k i 4 n , chupng mo-den m o t each m i l quang.
vdi gidi n a m , tuyet doi khong phai v i to ve ton
k i n h , ma la phan itng bai xich k i c h het. Tinh phuc tung khiep nhitcfc
Ngoi cao nhin xuong Tuy ho sii d u n g n h i e u trt ngCf m d i nhif mot
tht! h a n h v i ngon n g i l , n h i f n g ve m a t t a m l y ,
Co mot so ngifdi quen n h a u da l a u , t i m hien
lai la mot sif phuc t i l n g khiep nhifdc doi vdi
k h a sau, neu nhrf khong c6 x u n g dot ve t a m ly,
phong trao xa hoi va uy quyen.
dot nhien si^ d u n g Idi k i n h men, nghia la muon
pha vd tuyen canh giac t r o n g long doi phifdng, - Tieng ngoai lai
n h a m khong che doi phifdng, th^c hien ifdc
N h i f n g t i e n g noi difdc hap t h u t i f ngon ngfl
nguyen ap dao.
ngoai l a i . A i t h i c h sii d u n g no vao t r i f d n g hdp
-- Tieng tan th&i xa giao, thifdng c6 h a m y t a m ly nhif sau :
C h i t h i t ngon ngiJ t h i i d n g d i i n g difdc quan Chqy theo mo-den
c h i i n g yen t h i c h p h i i hdp vdi phong trao xa hoi Cho r a n g m i n h biet t i e n g nifdc ngoai ma to
t h d i do. T h i ! ngon ngi? do thifdng phat am gian ra difdng difdng t i f dac, c6 t a m l y vong ngoai.
ddn, de silt dung.
Ham muon hitcmg thu
N h i f n g ngifdi t h i c h d i i n g tieng t a n thdi c6
K h i ho silt d u n g so Idn t i e n g ngoai l a i , m u o n
h a m y t a m ly nhif sau :
nhd do ap dao doi phifdng, de cao ban t h a n .
Cam gidc hctn ngitcfi
Che giau mac cam
NhiJng ngifdi d i dau si5 d u n g tieng t a n thdi
Vifa g i l l cam giac hdn ngifdi, vijfa de che day '.
se CO cam giac hdn h a n vdi nhi3ng ke chifa biet
s^l mac cam ban t h a n .
va chifa silf dung.
133
132
- - Tieng dia phtfdng Mau sac bi an va hieu qua uy hiep t -
t Tieng dia phiWng khac vdi tieng tieu chuan, K h i si3 dung tieng long, se tao cho doi phvtong
chi CO the si5 dung trong nipt khu vitc. c6 cam giac : Chac ban c6 quan he vdi bang xa
J Tinh each khep kin h6i den. Sif md ho ve than phan ngiidi noi, se
khien hp nh\i diWc phii len mot mau sac bi an.
Neu hp CO the noi tieng chuan ma lai chpn
Neu vi the ma khien doi phiidng hoang sd, t h i
noi tieng dia phiWng trong khi xa giao, c6 the
s\i uy hiep gian tiep ciia han c6 hieu qua.
khang dinh tinh each hp la kieu khep k i n , c6
theo duoi nen van hoa truyen thong, t i i de nen.
Tung hoa nm
Gay sU chu y
Phan t i i tpi pham sii dung tieng long nham
Muon lam noi bat, gay stf chii y cua mpi ngiicJi
che day hanh vi xau xa ciia ban than, de ngiidi
- Tieng long khac khojig hieu diidc y hp noi, dat tdi hieu qua
Tieng long la tieng noi ciia nhflng nhoni tung hoa mu, che day dpng cd v^ muc dich that
bang dang, liiu nianh, trpm cildp. Hien nay con sii ciia minh.
dung de chi nhiing tieng dac thu giiJa nhiJng I ' f 'TP! of ^fl
ngiicfi cung trang Ma. Nhiing ngifdi noi tieng Sil bH dap ve tarn ly i
long trong t n l ^ n g hdp xa giao c6 ham y tarn ly
nhii sau : Ngiidi noi tieng long muon diing no de diing
len bite tildng tam ly cho minh, de ngiidi ngoai
Nay sink y thitc hcfn ngilcfi nao do khong t h i h i i u diWc bi mat ciia hp. V i hp thildng
Du ngiidi CO than phaii ra sao, neu si5 dung 1^ ke pha hoai xa hoi, khong dildc xa hoi chap
tieng long, deu xuat phat tit y thi!c muon hcfn nhan. Hp chi c6 t h i dila vao "the gidi tieng
ngilcfi. Dac biet khi ngifcJi khac khong nam diidc long" ciia minh, d i thifc hien sil ton tai "hdp
y nghia that ciia tieng long, rat nong long muon phap" ciia hp. Day chinh la sil bii dap ve tam
l ^ m ro, se gay cho ngifcJi noi khoai chi. 1^ ciia nhving ke noi tieng long.
134 135
- Tang phan than quen ua tin cay Neu phia n i l do mat, lung tiing, tham chi
Vi ho si5 dung thv? t i l n g chi Ivfu hanh trong to ra hot hoang, ho se cam thay vui mitng ha
"tang Idp" cua ho, thong qua do h i l t difdc than da- f
phan, tiJc la thuoc cung mot cong dong, nen Mong diMc cho ditng khd hem
tang miic than quen va t i n cay. Co ngifdi CO tinh noi tuc, de nhich lai gan
- Tieng tho tuc nhau vdi doi phifdng ve tam ly, hoac mong c6
ch6 di?ng kha hdn.
C6 nhilng ngildi thich t u tap nhau t ^ n g l u
bang thvL tieng tho tuc. Nhat la canh dan ong, Nham gay cam gidc lam Idn
cho rang chi k h i nao noi diWc bang tieng tho Co ngiidi cham diem mot c6 n^o do, c6 y noi
tuc mdi CO k h i khai nam nhi. Tarn 1^ cua ho ra ra vai cau tho tuc dot ngot, nham gay cam giac
sao ? sai lam cho doi phifdng. Day la each de doi
Bed ham muon chila diiac thoa man phildng lam t i l i n g doi ben da bildc vao quan he
than mat.
Nhflng ke thich noi tuc, thiidng mang tarn
- C a u noi hai hiidc
1^ lo lang bat an, nhifng lai khong c6 each giai
bay, lau ngay tich t u lai nen phai t i m cd hoi Cau noi hai hxidc viia t h i i vi vfia c6 y nghia
t n i t bau tam sii. sau xa. K h i cuoc tro chuyen da gan het "hap
dan", nen kip thdi pha tr6 vai cau hai hvidc, se
Tham do phan i2ng doi philcfng
mb ra mot hieu qua mdi. Hai hiidc khac vdi cau
Co ngifdi CO tinh noi tuc trifdc ngiicfi khac chuyen ciidi, tuy khong de moi ngvidi ciidi to,
phdi, nham tham do phan i!ng doi phifdng. Ho nhiing lai l ^ m nay nh sii mim ciidi y nhi. H ^ i
CO tinh chon van de lien quan tdi gidi tinh va hiidc lai khac vdi cham choc, khong tao cang
tinh due, noi vdi phai m i trong tnicJng hdp khong thang, ma la giiip ngiidi nghe nhe nhom. No
thich dang nhat, de theo doi sii mac cd e then bay to sii t i i t i n , thong minh, binh tinh cua
ciia ho. ngiidi noi, la sii b i i u hien ciia site manh t r i tiie
136 137
- v a t i i i h t h a n . Co the noi, ngifdi a n noi h a i hiidc hieii Cling \d'\i noi, l a dvfdng day ly giai noi
l a ngifdi t r i tiie, p h a n a n h dac t r i l n g t i n h each dung Idi noi c u a mot con ngildi.
v a CO mot so h a m y t a m ly n h i l s a u :
C l i n g mot c a u noi, n e u t h e m V£lo ngon ngilf
T6 ve itu viet p h u k h a e n h a u , se eo h a m y k h a e n h a u .
Doi liic la n h a m to ve ifu viet hcfn ngitcJi.
V i du k h i a i do noi c a u : " A n h l a m gi do ?",
To ve tan cong
n e u noi vdi giong b i n h thiicJng, cho t h a y ehi l a
L a mot e a c h noi t a n eong r a t tien Idi. L a hoi t h a m doi phildng, k h o n g c6 h a m y k h a e ;
c a e h t a n eong a n toan, g i a n tiep v a i t n h i e u n e u dvtng l a i s a u ehfi " a n h " mot lat, con " l a m
dildc x a hoi c h a p n h a n . gi do" noi mot e a c h c h a m r a i , t h i c a u noi ro
Til ve trade thitc tk r a n g da p h a s i l b a t m a n ; n e u noi n a n g chvl^
" a n h " , noi n h a n h c a u " l a m gi do" t h i h o a n toan
L a e a c h chong l a i svf d a u kho v ^ u y hiep
hoc 16 ro sif p h a n no c i i a doi phiidng.
c u a cuoc song thitc te. M i m ciicfi tnfdc s i i uy
h i e p do, l a mot e a c h ne t r a n h h i e n thiic cuoc
N h i f n g CO d i e u k h o k h a n l a ngilcfi t a d l l a m
song.
ro y n g h i a m a t chtf, nhifng l a i kho h i e u h e t y
n g h i a c i i a giong d i e u hoac moi ngifcfi h i e u theo
4 . H d m y t d m l y q u a g i o n g di§u :
mot each. X i n v i d u s i l diJng c a u , doi vdi mot
G i o n g d i e u c h i a m d i e u , toe do, giong cao so ngifcJi, t h i stf dttng l a i do tiidng t n l n g cho
t h a p Idn nho, doan n g a t q u a n g k h i noi. V i d u : viee " n h a n m a n h " , n h a m gay s i i c h i i y. N h i f n g
Thcf doc k h i noi, giong k h a n , giong to, ciicJi doi vdi mot so ngildi k h a e , s i i dtfng c a u the h i e n
k h a n h k h a c h , noi ca l a m , noi p h a giong nO, ro y n g h i a " k h o h g d d m k h a n g d i n h " . T o m l a i ,
hoac t h i c h keo d a i chrt cuoi...
n e u m u o n giai m a h a m y giong d i e u nao do,
Doi k h i gom ca dong tac k h i noi nhif gat c a n p h a i difa vao h o a n c a n h tro c h u y e n v a thoi
d a u , scJ miii... T h o n g thifcfng, c^c ngon ngil phii quen dac trifng ngon ngiJ c i i a doi phvfdng ma
do d e u m a n g y n g h i a n h a t d i n h , no difde x u a t x e m xet.
138 139
- Vay t h i doi vdi cac giong dieu cu the, c6
iiay eo the l a m te l i e t y ehi doi phifdng, che day
h ^ m y t a u i ly nhif t h i nao ?
jiuic dieh eong k i c h eua m i n h .
; V - Toe do noi cham
- Toe do noi nhanh
Toe do noi CO quan he r a t Idn doi vdi t m h
eaeh ngifdi noi. V i d u : ngiicfi nong t i n h thifcJng Ngifdi noi n h a n h t h i f d n g nong t i n h , " n h a n h
noi hdi n h a n h , ngifdi song noi t a m t h i f d n g noi mom n h a n h mieng". H a m y t a m ly nhif sau :
hdi eham. N h i f n g khong phai khong eo nhiJng Gioi an noi
thay doi. T r o n g m o t so tntcJng hdp n h a t d i n h ,
toe do noi phan a n h t h a i dp ngiidi noi. Thong Ngifdi noi n h a n h l a m doi phifdng khong c6
thifcfng, toe dp noi eham c6 h a m y n h i i sau : thdi gian suy n g h i , k h i e n doi phifcfng ehuyen
hoa t i l duy m o t each k h o n g t i f giae.
Tinh each vung ve it not
Ho then trong long
Hp t h i f d n g k e m t a i an noi, de che g i a u nhifdc
diem t r e n , hp r a t i t k h i ehu dpng noi ehuyen, N e u doi phifdng noi n h a n h hcfn b i n h thifdng,
k h i ean n o i , hp deu suy n g h i k y eang, de bay se CO h a i k i e u h a m y : M o t la t r o n g long cam
to d u n g y k i e n eua m i n h . Toe dp noi eham giiip thay ho t h e n v d i ban, t a n g toe dp noi de g i a m
hp d a n h l a i t h d i gian suy n g h i nhieu hcfn. bdt ap life t a m l y . H a i la ban t h a n hp eo nhifde
diem nhif ehifa ehuan h i day d i i k h i d a m phan,
Bat man trong long
mong t a n g toe noi de choan het t h d i gian suy
Day la m o t phan iJng t a m ly khae thifdng. nghi eiia doi phifdng.
neu doi phifcJng noi eham hdn b i n h thifdng, eho
t h a y hp dang bat m a n hoae t h u dieh vdi ban. Noi doi
C h u n g ta thifdng phat hien sif viec sau t r o n g
T r o n g m o t v ^ i t r i f d n g hdp n h a t d i n h , neu
eupe song thifdng ngay : h a i ngildi eai Ipn n h i f n g
nipt ngifdi noi n h a n h hcfn b i n h thvfdng, t h i eho
k h o n g la Idn tieng, ma la t i f n g cau eham r a i ,
thay b a n dang noi doi, v i hp k h o n g mu6n de
n h i f n g day m u i "thuoe sung", v i eaeh noi eham
lai cho doi phiftfng n g h i r a n g b a n dang "sap dat
140
141
- Idi noi d o i " , mdi chon each noi n h a n h khac Tarn trqng thieu on dinh
thifcJng. K h i t a m ly bat m a n don nen b m o t mi?c do
Giong to Idn n^o do t h i p h l n u a t se hoc p h a t , noi bat n h a t
1^ bieu h i e n luc cuong bao, liic t r a m uat, V£l
K h i xa giao, can dieu ehinh am t h a n h eiia
luon nay s i n h mot each t u a n hoan.
m i n h t i l y luc, d l t r a n h l a m phien ngifcJi khac,
do la each cii xi^ van hoa can p h a i l i l u y. N h i i n g , Thieu linh hoat
CO so ngilcJi t h i c h noi to t i e n g , xem nhxi ngifcJi A n to noi Idn m o i luc, m o i n d i , ehi biet cif
khac deu la ke diec. Day la dac diem ciia ngifcJi xilt vdi ngildi kh^c theo phong each xifa nay cua
cdi m d hoat bat. H a m y t a m ly n h i i sau : m i n h . N e n ho i t c6 b a n be t a m giao.
Dau 6c dcfn gian Co chap
NgiicJi noi to t r o n g Ian d a u t i e n gap m a t , N e u giong noi ngay t h i l d n g hdi b i n h t i n h ,
cho ngifdi khac cam giac ccli mcf. N h i i n g k h i dot n h i e n cat cao giong, liic do ban p h a i h i e u ,
q u a n sat k y , loai ngifdi nay t h i e u t i n h cam te ho dang m u o n k i e n t r i y k i e n , la m o t bieu h i e n
biidng b i n h . Doi k h i , s\i b i i u h i e n do b i ngildi
n h i , d a u 6c hdi ddn gian. B i e u hien cu the la
khac h i e u l a m la diia the h a m doa, l a m m a t d i
k h o n g biet XTS ly n h i i n g quan he giao tiep phiic
dieu k i e n tiep tue cau chuyen v d i doi phifdng.
t a p . A n tvfcJng t o t t r o n g Ian dau da h i m a t dan
v i b i i u h i e n ciia ho qua k e m , doi phitdng mat - Noi nho nhe
t h i e n cam. Ngifdi t h i c h noi nho nhe k h i giao tiep, ehac
Ngitcd thieu nhqy ben chan la ngvfdi song noi t a m . H a m y va dac trvfng
tam ly n h i l sau :
Co dac trvfng ve h i n h the la map map, tho
n g a n , cam t i n h kha b i n h lang, phong do on Mac cam nang
d i n h , cham chap. Ho t h i e u k h a nang t u y cd \tng N e u giong qua nho, den noi nghe k h o n g ro,
bien. tuy mot phan do ca t i n h , n h i t n g eung v6 t i n h
142 143
- cho thay ho niang mac cam nang ne kho giai - L e n bdng xuong tram
bay. Nhat la khi noi chuyen vdi ngvfdi c6 dia Giong noi len bong xuong tram c6 h^m f
vi, hoc thitc, dieu kien kinh t& cao hdn minh, tam ly va tfnh each ciia ngifcJi noi nhii sau :
bieu hien tren cang ro rang.
Til boc 16
Thieu til tin
Neu khong phai do yen cau nghe nghiep
Khi bay to y kien vdi doi phiidng, vi thieu (nhii xiidng ngon vien, hildng dan chiidng trinh),
t i i t i n ve noi dung d i l n dat ciia minh, nen ho thi ngiidi c6 giong noi len bong xuong tram c6
v6 tinh da ha thap giong, nay sinh cam giac y ham muon manh t i i bieu hien, ho mong qua
lai, cau vien tdi ngifdi nghe. c^ch noi tren de hoc 16 cA tinh, tai nang hcta
Thieu chin chdn ve mat tarn ly ngiicJi ciia minh.
Ngifcfi CO thoi quen noi nho nhe, thtfcJng difdc Co lam ra ve hi an
Idn len b^i sit cham soc an can ciia me. Hoi Khi xa giao, neu doi phiicfng c6 tinh ra giong
nho, ngitcfi me chac chan la ngifcJi phat ngon len bong xuong tram, cho thay ho thfch lam bo,
thay ho, nen k h i Idn len, ho mang theo hinh mong diing no de tang cam giac bi &n ve minh.
thiic giao lifu me con vao xa hoi, tvf^ng rang
- Gat dau
doi phitcJng ciing se nhii me de than hieu Idi
thi tham ciia minh, qua do dodn biet toan bo Trong t i n h hinh thong thiidng, gat dau to y
noi dung tam svf. Day chinh la sii thieu chin tdn dong, cho phep linh hoi... Nhiing ham y tam
chan ve tam ly, nang tinh y lai cua ho. 1^ ciia viec gat dau lai rong nghia hdn. Neu ta
quan sdt ky cdch gat dau cua doi phiidng, se
Day ni7 tinh
hieu diidc nhflng ham nghia dac thii nhii sau :
Neu ngifdi do luon thich ha thap giong khi
To ve idng nghe
noi, khong nhitng cho thay ho lam viec thieu
t\i t i n hoac c6 y lam ra ve bi an, ma con la Vxia lang nghe vi5a ra site gat d^u, cho thay
ngyidi day nd tinh. ho dang cham chii lang nghe doi phildng noi va
144 145
nguon tai.lieu . vn
