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- KHUC NGUYEN
Tham do
flNH CACH
NGl/CH Dcn
THt/VIENTINHBiNHTHU^Nj
NHA XUAT BAN VAN HOA THONG TIN
- Giung ta da biet con ngudi Id hinh thitc phdt
trien cao nhat cua sir song tren trdi ddt, Id dong
vat cao cap ducfc xd hoi hda va hinh thdnh tren
ccf sd lao dong, la chu the cua hoqt dong lich su
xd hoi.
Trong phqm vi rong, con ngudi la ddi tuifng
nghien citu cua da sd bo mon khoa hoc, cd tu
nhien Ian xd hoi nhu xd hoi hoc, nhdn loqi hoc,
dan toe hoc, sinh ly hoc, y hoc, my hoc... Trong
phqm vi hep, chi tap thdnh dia vi cua titng cd
nhdn vdi cd nhdn, vdi xd hoi, vdi moi trudng ; tit
do nay sinh hien tucrng tam ly cd nhdn ddc thii.
Neu nhu ndi y trudc la mot hoc thuyet vk con
ngudi cd he thong hodn chinh, thi y sau chi Id
hoc van chi dqo cu the ve cuqc song va giao tiep
cua cd nhdn trong xd hoi. Y trudc cho ban doc
biet ve "cdi gi" va "tqi sao", y sau cho bqn doc
biet ve "lam sao" vd "nen Idm sao".
Quyen sdch nay dmrc bien soqn tren ccf s(f
nhdn hoc nghia hep. Plidn ddu Id tim hieu con
5
- ngudi, quan sift tit be ngoai nhu ngu quan, tdc
tai, hinh dang, tinh cdch, tu the tay, tudng di
' ditng, cdch an mac, Idi ndi, chic viet vd tat cd
nhicng gi lien quan vdi con ngudi nhu tin hieu,
vat the'... Phan tich ham y tam ly vd ddc diim pliJn mot
tinh cdch cua doi phucfng, diin giai the gidi nqi
tam cua doi phucfng, dua ra cdu trd Idi de tham
khdo va lira chon. Phan giua Id su dung con ngudi
thong qua su ddnh gid titng nhdn tdi, gidi thieu
TIM H I E U
nguyen tac su dung vd muu lucfc dilng ngudi hieu
hieu. Phdn cuoi la cdch lam ngudi, thong qua cdc
chi tiet cuoc song, nhdn mqnh tinh quan trqng
hinh tucfng, can cit cdc hinh tucfng khdc nhau, gidi
thich ham y tdm ly vd ddc diem tinh cdch theo
TINH C A C H
titng doi tucfng, qua do gidi thieu cdch Idm Idnh
dgo, cap dudi, ban be vd ngudi than the ndo cho C O N NGirdi
phdi dqo.
Quye'n sdch nay chi nham cung cdp nhitng
thong tin di ban doc suy nghi, khong phdi de cdc
ban "rap khudn". Dung y cua chung tdi chi la
nham giiip cho ban doc tim hieu vd thong cam
hcfn vdi ngudi xung quanh, dqt tdi muc dtch cu
xu hda muc.
V
6 7
1
- I
DOI NET
DAC TRVNG CUA TINH
CACH CON NGir&l
- Tmh each la sii tong help nhflng dac t n i n g 2. Nhom mo td cam xuc: N h i i hitng hcf,
tarn ly, tvfdng doi on dinh trong thai do va hanh lanh nhcit, xao dong, on dinh, lac quan, tram
vi thiic te cua con ngifcJi. udt...
M6i ngifdi deu c6 tarn ly k h i the n^y luc the
3. Nhom mo ta y chi: Nhif qua quyet, do
kia, nay ich ky mai v i tha, cifcJi chvfa xong da
dit, manh dan, tich cite, tieu cite, vitat kho, ho
khoc... Chiing difdc s^ng loc, ket can, dan xen
cuoc nita chiing...
tao thanh tinh each tieu bieu eho mot hang
ngiicJi. 4. Nhom mo td ly tinh: Nhif Idm can, hbi
B i l u hien cua tinh cdch \k thdi do doi vdi hat, dan do, c6 6e mit dac, c6 6c sdng tao, tit
thrfe te cuoc song. La mot hien tiidng tarn ly, duy nhanh nhqy, hcSp logic...
qua hoat dong thiic t i l n diidi sii tkc dong Tom lai, dii nhan tam moi ngifdi mot khac,
ciia xa hoi, tfnh cAch cua con ngif^i ngay diidc tfnh each ngii^i ddi van eo nhiJng dac tfnh chung.
hinh thanh ro net. Noi each khac, do la phan Cho nen srf tham do, phan tich, tong hcJp, vk
anh qua trinh song va sinh hoat eiia con ngxlcJi.
nhan thi!c ve no mang mot y nghia trong dai.
Nhrf vay, tinh each la ph4n mang y nghia trong
tam ciia ca tinh.
Tinh each c6 ket cau ph\!c tap, bao g6m
nhieu dac triing. Co the khdi qudt qua bon
nhom :
1. Nhom mo ta thai do tir thdn: Nhii hung
dc, hien Idnh, thanh that, gian xdo, hdo phong,
ich ky, khieni ton, tit man...
10 11
- 1 . D g n g p h d n liet :
Cu the bieu hien nhii sau :
Khuynh hil&ng khep kin
Loai ngildi nay khong thich giao tiep vdi moi
ngiicJi, CO thai do the? d vdi xung quanh. Thong
thifdng, ho thich cam lang, c6 doc, nhiit nhat.
n Mang hai thit tinh cam trdi ngUac
Tuy ho CO hanh vi tron tranh tieu cifc, doi
liic lai to ra tich ciic. Ho viJa xem minh khong
TINH CACH CdA dang mot xu, vrfa danh gia minh cao hdn ngifcJi
HOT SO DANG NGVCfl khac mot bac.
Dac triing than minh
Nhin chung c6 cam giac gay go, xanh xao,
chan tay thon dai. Neu la ni^ t h i dang ngifcJi
nho be, thifdng la ngilc phang.
Dac trilng Ian da
Lan da thieu mau, xanh xao, kho, khong
bong, min. Tdi tuoi trung nien, mach mau cho
thai difdng loi len, da hoc lay xitong.
Dac tritng khudn mat
Net mat ro ret, nhat la nhin ben loi 16m
kha nhieu, miii dai, cam gay, mat bau due ngan.
12 13
- Dac trilng toe i »va - Ddc trilng lan da
Ngvtoc vdi ngiidi beo phi, toe ky mot ram Lan da bong lAng, mku tot, dau mui va ma
hdn toe ky hai. Toe, m^y ram, vifa eiing vifa Xing do. M s diidi da deu, eo earn giae dinh thit.
nhieu. Nhat la giiia may, nhieu long td, nhtf
Dac tritng khudn mat
lien nhau. Loai dan ong nay i t khi hoi dau.
Be ngoai khuon mat tr6n v^ diu, c6 eam
2. D g n g t o t b u n g : gidc tr6n tria. M u i cii toi. Trdn rong, dau to.
Dac trilng toe
Hoan toan ngvfde vdi dang phan liet, bieu
hien cu the nhif sau : Da so toe mem, ehan tran nhii l i i i len tren,
chinh giila ni5a v6ng tr6n, hdi hoi, nhiing khong
Gioi xa giao
ro net. Rau ram, moe rat rong, dang ngay ngan,
Ctf xi^ than thiet, hien hau, eo long thifdng long tren minh kha nhieu.
va nhiet tinh giup dS ngvfcJi khac. K h i tro chuyen,
3. D a n g n h a t h e t h a o :
thildng tao cho ngiicJi doi dien cam giac ngay
thang, thoai mai, khong go bo. Du eo noi nong Dac t n l n g nhii sau :
eung i t de bung.
Can than ti mi
Chu trong thitc te
Loai ngifdi n^y khong chiit cau tha, luon
Khong noi suong, c6 the nhanh chong thich theo qui tae. Ho song eo tinh nghia, ton trong
ling moi hoan canh. dao diJc, trat tif xa hoi, mong song cuoc song
Bqc trilng than hinh yen on, thiic tai. Ho khong de buong troi ildc
md va tinh toan ciia minh.
D i i n hinh la beo map. Dau to, c6 ngan va
tron, tay chan ngan, nhat la dau ngon tay tron Kem an noi
va ngan. DifcJng net mat diu dang, ngu quan Ho khong gioi diSn dat thai do ban than,
ean xiing. Lan da ciia nH rat mem, mat no day. cho ngifdi khae cam giac cham chap. Thife te
14 15
- Nhan vat nha ngoqi nha
cung vay, ho lam viec cham hdn ngifcJi khac,
nhiing k h i hao hitng, ho c6 the gay n h i l u bat Hp thifdng CO bau ban vay quanh, neu khong
5 chung vdi dam dong, hp se cam thay buon te.
ngd.
Co chieu hit&ng bao thu Phong do dien gid
Ban tinh can kiem, t i i tifcfng kha bao thu. Co the ciidi noi vui ve thoai mai tnfdc mat
Tuy nhien, doi khi hp cung la tien phong cap ngiicJi la. Noi chuyen trifdfc dam dong khong he
tien, diia tat ca site manh tich t u lau ngay boc nhiit nhat, r u t re. Thai dp ung dung, hPi lam
phat mot phen, gay nen hau qua kho lifcJng. IcJi nhieu chuyen, thich thuyet trinh...
Ngay thang
Dqc trilng than hinh
Hp nghi ra cai gi, du 5 trifcfng hdp nao, deu
Khoe khoan. Neu la nam, than hinh se la
noi thang, khong giau giem. Tinh hoc tnfc, khong
mot tarn gidc ngiWc ly tifcfng, khoe manh ran
chiit quanh co, t r i keo.
chac, ccf bap nay ncf, than hinh can doi, site liic
tran tre. Tinh cam manh liet boc phdt
Dac trilng khudn mat Doi k h i noi tran loi dinh, nhifng lai nhanh
chong quen di.
Khuon mat noi chung rong, to, dai. M u i dai,
cam dai. Mat hinh bau due dai. Cung c6 khuon Giau tinh ngilcfi
mat phang hoac dau hdi nhon. Hp v u i long giiip dd ke khac. K h i nghe ngifcJi
ta ke ve cau chuyen bi tham, lap ti!c r i i long
Bqc trilng Ian da
thitdng, khoe chung vdi ngifdi cung canh ngp.
Lan da do skm, da day, chai. Tren mat d^
Thieu ben bi
noi mun, cam giac khong sach.
Thieu quan niem sap xep t h i ! tif trifdc sau
4. Dang cori mcr, hoat bdt : nhanh cham khi lam viec, tinh tinh luon xao
dpiig khong dang t i n cay. Khong the quan triet
Dac tnfng nhil sau :
THI/ ViEM im BiNH THUAM 17
16
- t\i dau tdi cuoi, phu phiem. Neu cac bieu hien Co chap v6 cung
tren ro ret, se la ngifdi khong c6 trach nhiem.
Vi k h i chat mem yen, ugitcJi ta c6 cam giac
5. Dang song noi tarn : ho rat CO chap, tham chi ngoan c6, qua nghieng
ve tit ve. Ho khong d i nhan IcJi nidi, khong tuy
Hoan toan trai ngiWc vdi dang ccli mcf, boat
tien phu boa y kien dam dong - nhat la doi vdi
bat, dang song noi tarn, c6 dac trifng nhif sau :
sit vat mdi me, ho khang cit manh. Ban kho
Co doc thuyet phuc ditdc ho. Thong thitdng cf mot gidi
ban nhat dinh, ho con c6 the thoa hiep, nhitng
H Q ghet dam dong, khong thich giao tiep,
neu vitdt qua gidi ban, se kho ma thanh cong.
s0 tdi nhiing cupc hop dong ngiicJi. Neu qua cite
doan, ho giau minh vao thap nga, rcJi tap the Biet gin gin tinh ban
ra 5 rieng. Ho rat kho giao tiep, kho cit xii. Khong de
gi ket ban ngay t\i phut dau, cung khong d%
Noi ndng e then
bieu 16 tinh cam. Nhitng sau mot khoang thdi
Doi khi CO viec muon noi, lai cit ngap ngiing, gian quen nhau, ban se phat hien, ho c6 trai
muon to thien cam, lai do mat e then. Khi muon tim hien hau va tinh tinh that tha, biet nghi
tho 16 tinh cam vdi ai, ho loay hoay vung ve. cho ban, chu dao va te nhi. Ban se phat hien
ra ho CO nhieu itu diem, c6 the duy t r i tinh ban
Y thitc tit ve rat mqnh
lau dai sau sac so vdi ngitdi ccii md, hoat bat.
Ho CO y thitc tit ve manh liet doi vdi sit kich
thich ngoai lai. Chi mot chuyen con con, dii
khien ho buon phien khong yen.
Thieu qua quyet
Kha te nhi, nen luon phien long vdi nhilng
chuyen vat, do dit mai khong the quyet dinh.
18 ^ 19
- 1. H a m y tam ly cua dnh mat :
Doi mat khoiig nhrfng la cd quan quan trong
cua ccf the con ngifdi, ma con la "cv^a so tam
h6n", phan anh nguyen ven the gidi noi tam
cua mot ngifdi. Du trong cuoc song thifc hoac
trong tac pham van hoc nghe thuat, ngifdi ta
deu rat quan tam va mieu ta ky lif3ng ve no.
Ill Do la v i "doi mat c6 Idi noi that tha hdn cai
mieng".
Anh mat 1^ nguon thong t i n quan trong cho
HAM Y Tim CACH THE
sii giao tiep gifla ngitcJi va ngvfdi. Anh mat chang
TANG NGirai odi nhiing bieu 16 tinh ban va y doi dich, hanh phiic
0 v^ dau kho, scJ set va hai hiing... Cac tinh cam
con ngifcJi noi chung, ma trong qua t r i n h giao
tiep t i m hieu, c6 the thong qua anh mat ma di
sau khai thac the gidi noi tam ciia doi phvfdng,
dat tdi muc di'ch xem mat bat hinh dong.
Doi mat khong the che day sit tot xau trong
noi tam. K h i nghe Idi noi, xem cii chi ciia doi
phvfdng, can nhin ky doi mat, se de dang phan
biet that hit.
Manh Ti^ titng bao : "Ngitcfi c6 long ngay
thang t h i doi mat trong sang ; ngitcJi c6 long
x^u xa t h i doi mat van due". Neu ta ap dung
21
- nguyen tac d6 v^o viec giao tiep vdi ngddi khac, rang day la anh mat hien tif, an tifcJng v^ thanh
thi du trong long doi phiWng c6 gi giau giem, qui.
anh mat deu phan anh nguyen ven. NgvfcJi noi 4. Cap : anh mat cif dao quanh nhif khi con.
doi thao thao bat tuyet, nhifng anh mat luon u Ngifdi xifa cho rang, mot ngifcJi neu c6 bo dang,
am dao dien. Neu khong chii y quan sat, se kho IcJi noi, dang di, an uong, vui buon deu to ra
tim hieu noi tam ciia doi phvfdng. voi va, CO the sdm lap gia dinh, nhifng de chet
Ngifdi xita CO 10 each de quan sat va phan sdm, la anh mat hung.
tich anh mat : 5. Oai : to ra oai nghiem du khong n6i gian.
1. Tang : thong thifdng tinh than an sau Mat dai v^ to, du mcl hay nham, deu c6 khi
trong mat, khong de 16 ra ngoai. Chi khi ngoi the. Gap chuyen vui hay chuyen buon deu khong
yen tinh mot minh, doi mat sang long lanh, nhii to ra qua kich dong. Anh mat nay cho ngifdi
do sang ciia my ngoc linh chau, cho ngiidi nhin khac cam giac uy nghi ma ne sd. Ngifdi c6 anh
CO cam giac yen tinh, day sit tin titdng. Do la mat nay, hoac la ke xau, hoac la ngifdi tot noi
anh mat ngoai hang. Con ngifcJi c6 anh mat nhif bat.
vay se lam nen nghiep \dn. 6. Hon : d6i mat to nhifng khong sdng, thieu
2. Lo : 16 CO nghia la anh mat dl 16. Thif^ng phan minh, dd din. Anh mat do dif bao sif ngheo
la mat loi, md to tritng trifng nhif dang n6i nan, de tien, lam viec gi deu khong xong, khong
gian, dii kh6ng c6 than sac may, ke ca ve mat CO ket qua tot.
va ci5 chi cung nhif vay. Con ngifdi c6 anh mat 7. Hba : anh mat tif nhien, tifdi sang, la con
nhif vay, tuy giau c6, nhifng la ke gian xao va ngifdi diem dam hien ho a, khong vui ma ci! nhif
tham lam. vui. Dii khi sac gian hdn, vin c6 sac tifdi, nhin
3. Tinh : anh mat em diu, trong treo. Nhin tiut xa vIn cam thay hoa nha. Ngifdi c6 anh mat
qua CO cam giac diem dam ; quan sat that ky, nhif vay la loai ngifdi c6 tam long rong rai,
va lau, sif yen tinh van nhif xifa. Ngifdi xifa cho khong ganh ti, khong thien vi.
22 23
- 8. Kinh : than sac sd set nhvf gap chuyen - Nhin cham chii
hai hiing. Than khi hion bien doi, mat thieu
Thong thifdng, trong qua trinh giao tiep,
sang, thieu on dinh. Mieng map may, di ditng
nhin nhau hdn 5 phiit t h i goi la nhin cham ehu.
an ngii luon nhif sd set bat an. Loai ngiicii nay
No ehiia y nghia doi dich tham k i n . Cho nen
lam viec gi deu thieu kien t r i , kho thanh cong.
da s6 ngilcJi tranh nhin nhau nhif vay de to ve
9. Tuy : anh mat ciia ngifdi say riWu. Trong khiem nhvfcJng. Nhin cham chii doi k h i c6n to
mat lay chuyen cham chap, nhii benh lau khong ra yeu eau giiip dd. Trong trvfdng hdp nhif vay,
khoi, ngu me chifa thvtc, than k h i me muoi. Loai chi nham quan sat tam nhin ciia doi phiidng.
ngifdi nay ngu dot, d l ngo doc m ^ chet.
K h i dam phan, ngifdi ta thildng khong nhin
10. Thodt : nhil ngildi go, dii ngoi an uong, nhau cham chii. Neu doi phildng chon each nay,
van thieu than khi. Dang noi chuyen nay, tam h^m y tam ly nhvf sau :
chi lai chuyen sang viec khac, nhif mot cai xac
khong hon. Chet vi benh dien cuong. Til khep kin
0 day ta khong can phan tich each noi me Anh mat cham chii nhin tren mot diem nao
t i n cua ngifdi xita, nhifng chi i t ta b i l t ditcJc anh do, gan nhii c6 dinh, bap thit gifcfng mat citng
mat trong tac dung xi^ the h dc?i, da dildc con dd, khong tinh cam, nhit deo mat na, khong c6
ngildi lifu y tif thud xa xita. phan itng vdi sit viec xung quanh.
Vay t h i tiJng anh mat cu the se c6 nhifng Tit the Men
ham y tam ly khi giao tiep, lam quen hoac dam
Neu nhii ban va doi thu gap nhau Ian dau,
phan dau tranh ? Ban lam sao nhin qua anh
ma doi phiidng thich nhin cham chii v^o mat
mat, ma thau hieu difcJc the gidi noi tam cua
ban roi ciidi noi vui ve, noi len anh ta dang de
d6i phifctog ?
phong eanh giae vdi ban. Doi phiidng to ve liu
Cac phan tich difdi day se giiip ban hieu Viet hdn ban, nham suy doan trang thai tam ly
mot each khai quat. ciia ban.
24 25
- TU phong ve ' -- slrJ Tim ra nhiiac diem '''^
N e u doi phvWng n h i n ban hoi l a u , khong ne
N h i n cham chii con dong vai " t r i n h sat" t r o n g
t r a n h a n h m a t cua ban, y c6 y do tao sii de
qua t r i n h giao tiep. T r o n g t h i M n g trifdng, vdi
phong de doi pho vdi svf t a n cong cua ban. A n h
c^i n h i n cham chii ciia doi phiWng, m o t la doan
ta luon sd h i ba n l a m h a i , d i i ban da c6 gang
bat t a m ly b a n , h a i la n h a m t i m ra nhifcfc diem
to r a CO t h a n h y. K h i giao tiep vdi loai ngifcfi
cua ban de t a n c6ng. V i d u : ngifdi canh sat k h i
n h i l vay, p h a i chii y cii chi cua m i n h , dijfng de
t h a m van ke t i n h n g h i thifdng n h i n vao d6i m a t
dang d i 16 nhildc diem, t r a n h h i doi phiidng
ke ay, n h a m tao r a ap life pha vd t a m l y de
xem thiidng. Dijfng mong c6 diWc cam giac quen
ph6ng cua ban. Day la ly do t a i sao t a cam thay
t h a n vdi loai ngiidi nay.
kho c h i u k h i b i ngifdi khac n h i n cham cham.
N6i long km ddo
- Nhin Id la
N e u doi phiWng n h i n ban k h i noi, c6 nghia
1^ a n h ta da c6 t h i e n cam vdi ban va c6 y muon C h i a n h m a t lay dong b a t d i n h , k h i e n ngifdi
giao l i i u tiep tvic. K h i n h i n cham cham khong khac kho c h i u , nay s i n h t a m ly de phong. N h i f n g
r d i xa, c6 le m u 6 n tho 16 t a m sii vdi ban. C h i i doi luc, cai n h i n do do site ep ciia doi phifdng
y : neu h a i ngiidi deu la m3, t h i r a t c6 th6 la gay nen.
c6 t a k h o n g m u o n cho ban biet t a m sii ciia c6
ay. Khong CO y tot
Bay dc y
K h i doi phifdng n h i n ban vdi a n h m a t k h i
D6i liic, cai n h i n cham chu day ac y, cung Id la, liic lay dong, eo the k h a n g d i n h h a n dang
1^ nguyen n h a n ma da so ngitdi k h 6 n g muon CO mifu do gi do. N h i l n g ngifdi tiep t h i h a n g
doi dien vdi a n h m a t nhvf vay. B a n k e t hdp vdi hoa, vifa dao m a t n h i n b a n , vifa thao thao khoe
cac bieu hien khac cua d6i phitong, se d6 dang khoang, ban p h a i can t h a n va chii y chat lifdng,
n h a n biet h a m y th^c sif la gi. gia ca hang cho ky.
26 27
- Noi trdi v&i long 'ViV. •» V Mac ke sit ton tqi ciio doi phifxMg
Anh mat Id la, Idi noi ap ilng, cho thay doi Bat man trong long
phitong dang noi doi, khong mu6n de ban doan
difdc tam ly cua ban. N l u doi phitong la ngifcJi Svf bat man va bvfc tifc doi vdi ban, ciing
hdp tac hoac khach bang ciia ban, hay chii y khien doi phifdng c6 anh mat tvfdng t\i. V i du :
nbanh chong cham di!t quan he lam an, neu Khi doi ban trai gai von khong c6 mau thu^n,
khong de sinb nguy cd bi gat. d6t nhien c6 xich mich, tuy ve mat ho v i n giii
y§n, nhifng anh mat md mang that than, hoc
Nong ruot 16 ro tam trang bat man va khong yen.
Doi liic, anh mat Id la bieu hien sot ruot,
Tinh tinh nhu nhiMc
bat an ve noi tam. Bo dang ciia ho c6 ve nhil
ngifdi diing ngoi khong yen. Dii bat cit trong tam trang nao, ho deu c6
dnh mat md mang, v i ho khong muon bi ngiidi
Thay long doi dq
khac nhan biet diem yeu ciia minh, danh phai
Khi ban luan mot so van de nghiem tiic (nhii lam ra ve nhif van dang ton tai.
dam cifdi...) girfa hai ngiidi yen nhau, doi phifdng
CO anh mat Id la, chac chan ngvtdi do dang mang Sit nhan nqi da t&i cite hqn
mot bau tam sif bat Idi vdi ngitdi yeu. Neu bo K h i hai ngifdi xay ra xung dot, mot ben to
qua Anh mat do, de tiep tuc phat trien, kho ve hung ho ham doa, ben kia thildng c6 anh
tranh hi ton thifdng. mat md mang, ban ditng lam titdng ben kia
- Nhin md mang mem yeu d§ an hiep. Trai lai, ban dang d trang
thai nhan nai cite diem, sap sifa bung no cdn
mot anh mat phitc tap, khong c6 tinh
gian hoac dang chd thdi cd de tan cong. Neu
cam, khien ngifdi ta c6 cam giac trong rong,
ben kia cit tiep tuc tien tdi, doi phifdng chac
kho do.
chan t i m each chong tra. Ngifdi c6 anh mat md
Ham y nhil sau : mang doi k h i cung nguy hiem.
28 29
- Tram tit . - 4 1^. Han khong nhin thang ban, chang nhvfng vi
Khi tram tvi, moi ngiicJi c6 dang ve khac han khong muon nhin th^y ban, hdn mJa han
nhau, CO ngifdi nham mat, c6 ngitdi Ic? dd, c6 cung khong muon de ban nhin thay. Do la loai
ngifdi CO cai nhin md mang. Khi ay, bo 6c dang ngitdi khep kin.
hoat dong het site, chi khong mu6n de 16 ra
Bao ve rieng til
ngoai m^ thoi. Chd khi suy nghi chin mui, anh
mat se c6 than sac. Ta thifdng phat hien hien tildng vui nhif
- Ne tranh cai nhin. sau : hai ngitdi khong quen, khi ngau nhien
trao nhau anh mat, lap tiic rdi xa, chd khong
Chiing ta biet rang, tiep xuc cai nhin la nhin thang. Do la vi hai ben khong muon cho
nguon thong tin quan trong khi tim hieu vdi
doi phifdng biet ve noi tam, c6 tim each bao ve
nhau thong qua Idi noi. No cho biet miic do
chuyen rieng tif.
thich thii vdi cau noi girfa doi ben. Ngiidi ta c6
the thong qua cai nhin m^ cam nhan dvWc yeu To ra thich thii
thich, ghet bo ciia doi phitong. Nhilng h mot so
Trong giao tiep, doi khi vi muon lam quen
tnldng hdp, CO so ngifdi chu dong ne tranh cai
vdi doi phvWng, nhifng lai khong muon de doi
nhin nhtf vay. Svf lay chuyen anh mat phan anh
phildng hieu difdc sb thich ciia minh, thifdng
hoat dong noi tam ciia con ngifdi, chi can l\lu
chon each trao doi cho nhau anh mat trong giay
y, CO the tim thay nhieu dieu chan that ma ban
can biet. Lay chuyen anh mat cung thitdng gap lat roi lap tiJc ne tranh. Nhif mot c6 gai xinh
nhvf khi dita tin xau hoac ke lai chuyen dau dep xuat hien tntdc dam dong, moi ngitdi deu
kho ; CO khi vi mac cd, sd hai, tham chi noi doi. nhin tap trung vao c6 ay, nhifng c6 so dan ong
Ham y tam ly nhvf sau : thich chon each nhin mot Ian that ky, roi quay
sang ndi khac. Chang le so dan ong do khong
Tii khep kin
thich thii CO gai do if ? Khong phai. That la ho
Neu doi phifcfng ne tranh anh mat ban mot rat thich thii, nhifng chi c6 de nen ma thoi. Khi
each kheo leo, cho thay han c6 trcl ngai ve tam xung quanh ban xuat hien hien tifcJng tifdng tif,
31
- xin hay quan sat ky each bieu hien ciia dan ta khong them nhin minh, minh lam sao lay
ong, ban se hieu, hoa ra han dang nhin "trom" dtWc long CO..., cii the khien ci5 chi ciing mat
lia lia vao c6 gai ay. ttf nhien, hai ngifcTi kho long lam ban.
Gay chu y Ho then trong long
Neu tranh anh mat doi phvfdng, to ve nhif Liic xa giao, neu ne tranh cai nhin trong
binh than trong trvfcfng hdp xa giao, chi la meo tinh hu6ng diidc chii y, rat c6 the diidng sii ho
muon gay chii y ma thoi. then trong long, sd bi lat tay - vi anh mat lam
Tinh tinh chu dong boc 16 noi tam. Cho nen, diia tre pham sai lam
thiidng ne tranh anh mat phu huynh, ciii dau
Khi tro chuyen xa giao, ngifdi lay chuyen yen lang.
c^i nhin triidc tien, tinh tinh tiidng doi chu Mac cam
dong. Co ngitcJi muon minh cl vao vi tri vifdt
troi, cung c6 hanh dong tifdng tii. Thong thvfcJng, Nlu doi phifc?ng "mac ke" thong tin dila ra
ngitdi lay chuyin anh mat tntdc khi tro chuyen, ivi anh mat ban, cho thay anh ta hoac la ke tii
la ke thang Idi ve tam ly, vi ho da tao ap liic cao tif dai, hoac 1^ ke can than ky lifdng. Loai
tam ly vdi doi phiidng (doi phifdng xem thiicJng ngiidi nay thildng c6 mac cam nang ne, can
minh if, hoac khong hcJp vdi nhau il ?). nhieu thdi gian tim hieu, dtjfng nen voi phan
xet ho.
Tritdng hdp can phai don ti4p nhiJng ke
khong tap trung cai nhin ngay Ian dau gap mat, Bat man v&i hien trang
phai rat cin than, tranh pham sai lam va tao Triidc khi ban d^it Idi, anh mat doi phiidng
ap litc tam ly khong can thiet. Vi du : Khi hai da ne tranh di ndi khac, dieu nay ham y : "Toi
ngifcfi xem mat Ian dau, neu phia nii ne tranh khong tan thanh cau noi ciia ban". Neu la phai
cai nhin ciia phia nam, du vdi ly do e le, van nii CO quan he quen than, nhin ban mot liic roi
khien phia nam cam thay kho chiu, nhx anh la ne sang ch6 khac, ban drfng hieu lam c6 ay mac
ke song noi tam, chac chan se nghi rang : c6 ke sii ton tai ciia ban, ma chfnh vi c6 muon
32 33
- ban h i l u diWc pham chat cua c6. Phdi ntt c6 Ban phai het si!e chii y, hoa giai cdn gian
b i i u hien nhif vay thiicJng bat man vdi hien cua doi phiidng bang c\i chi IcJi noi thieh hdp,
trang. tranh gay phien toai khong can thiet.
- Nhin lap lanh - Liidt n h i n
Anh mat lay dong bat dinh, luc sang luc toi Anh mat lildt nhanh xung quanh, i t nhieu
la anh mat nguy h i i m . Do la luc doi philcJng lam ngifcJi khac kho chiu. Ham y nhif sau :
doi dich hoac nghi ngcJ ban. Nhin ttf goc do sinh
the nqt ngiicfi
ly, do la do mi mat xup xuong. Ham y nhii sau :
Day 1^ anh mat thii^ng thay h nhiJng ngiicJi
Nghi ngcf, hieu lam
c6 dia v i cao trong xa hoi. Ho hi&i nhin nhii
Gap ngifcJi c6 anh mat lap lanh, Idi noi va vay, mot la ra ve tif each, hoc thilc, tien tai hdn
viec lam ciia ban phai cu the, ro r^ng, may ra ngildi. Dich cua cdi nhin la tao uy the bao t n i m
mdi tranh dvfcfc sit hieu lam va nghi ngcJ ciia y. len doi philctog.
Dang cdnh gidc Tim sil bao ve
NgtfcJi Ian dau tien gap mat c6 anh mat nhvf Doi \di nhiing ke song noi tam hoac nhu
vky doi vdi ban, cho thay dang het siJc canh nhifcJc, k h i dung cai nhin liidt qua, c6 y cau
giac, hoac da nay sinh each nhin sai ve ban. c^u sif bao ve. Ho khong muon tam sif hi doi
Luc nay ban nen t i m edeh dieu chinh cvL chi phifdng hieu difde, lai khong biet chon each bao
h^nh v i , chii y ve mat doi phiicfng tien trien ra ve khac, nen khong muon c6 dinh cai nhin ; ci!
sao. nhif dita tre pham 16i, liic nhin cha, liic nhin
me.
Tam trqng doi dich
Neu anh mat lap lanh dfl doi, c6 t h i khang Suy dodn doi phitcfng
dinh sii hieu lam, nghi ngd ciia han da tdi liic K h i doi phifdng giao tiep vdi ban, ma ^nh
phdt gian. mat cii lifdt qua liidt lai, chac han dang suy
34 35
- doan ban c6 each n h i n , each n g h i ve han ra sao.
Thich thu
Hoae mong t i m difdc cai gi do de chon h a n h
dong tvfdng ving. G i i i a ngvfdi khac p h a i , neu c6 a n h m a t nhvf
vdy, cong t h e m n u ciM, cho biet doi phitong
- L i e c nhin t h i c h ban. T h i i d n g la phai nrt n h i n p h a i n a m .
Cho nen, liec m a t cung la each noi len " t i n h y "
Doi t r o n g Hec ve mot ben m a t de n h i n . A n h
khong Icfi.
m a t liec n h i n to t a m ly t i f choi, k h i n h k h i , bat
m a n hoac t h i c h t h i i . Da so t i n h huong cho thay, - Nhay mat
liec n h i n la Anh m a t t h i e u ton trong. Ngifdi c6
N h a y m a t la dong tac lien tuc n h a m mcl cua
cai n h i n nhtf vay t h i l d n g la ke t i i cao hoac mang
m a t , t a m l y hoc goi do la "hien ttfdng co giat",
t a m ly sd h a i - Da so la p h u n i i .
1^ h a n h v i k h o n g IcJi, noi len noi t a m . N e u nhay
H a m y nhif sau : m a t v d i so Ian qua day, t h i 1^ bieu hien ve t h a n
kinh.
Choi til ua khinh khi
H a m y n h i f sau :
N e u doi phitcfng c6 cai n h i n n h i l vay k h i giao
Trong long bat an
tiep, chac chac da nay sinh t a m l y choi ti5 va
k h i n h k h i doi vdi ban v i mot nguyen nhan nao Ngifcfi thifcfng nhay m a t , n h a t 1^ nrf, cho biet
do. N e u ban c i ! mac ke, t h i kho duy t r i h i ! u noi t a m dang t h i e u cam giac an toan - N h a t la
n g h i , t h a m chi gay kho k h a n cho viec t i m h i e u p h u nrf Idn len t r o n g hoan canh gia d i n h k h o n g
ve sau. T o m l a i , khong the bo qua cai n h i n ay. tot, ci5 chi t h i e u tii chu do cang t h e m ro net.
Xeni niinh la chinh
Bat man
Ngifdi p h u niJ thifcJng nhay m a t , la ngifdi
Doi k h i doi phiWng to ve bat m a n , k h i n h
t h i c h dat m i n h 6 v i t r i t a m l y , y thitc tvf t h a n
k h i . N e u ban t r a dua bang a n h m a t tildng t\i,
r a t m a n h . Doi v d i dan ong, t h i p h a i nvL nhxi vay
d6 dan t d i x u n g dot trvfc dien, l a m to chuyen.
r a t kho i ! n g pho.
36
37
1
i
I
- 2 . H d m y t d m 1/ q u a net m a y : - Gitfdng may
Hai long may giiidng len, hdi chech ve hai
Co the khang dinh rang, moi ci3 dong ciia
bSn, khien Ian da triidc tran di dong len tren^
long may, deu dai dien cho mot th\ tinh cam
tao ra nep nhan d^i song song. y
nhat dinh. Ddng ve cua long m^y se thay doi
tiiy theo tam trang. Theo cac nha tam ly, long Ham y nhif sau :
m^y gom hdn 20 trang thai, vdi nhflng ham y Dang CO ilu the
khac nhau :
K h i mot ngifcfi dang nam l i u the, muon dvfa
- Nhiu may v^o do tao site ep cho doi phifcfng, thii^ng c6 trf
Hai long may co gan lai vdi nhau, diem giiia the giiicfng may. /
2 dau long may xuat hien nhiJng nep nhan ngan Tam trang vui ve
va thang.
Ngifdi ta thtfcJng giiidng may k h i trong long
Ham y nhtf sau : vui tiidi, con goi la "ncf may, nd mat".
Au sau Chef thcfi c(f
La loai ngifdi c6 tam ly lo au va ifu sau, rat Ngiidi mang tinh xam lildc, lai lo lang sii
mong thoat khoi hoan canh tnidc mat, nhvfng tan cong cua minh khong dilcJc hieu qua, hoac
lai khong nhit y. nhin khong ro dieu doi phifctag uy hiep, muon
tim hieu v^ nhin ro hoan canh hdn, chef ddi thSi
Phong ngii
cd thich hcfp.
Thong thifdng ngilcJi ta c6n cho nhiu may - Nhan may
tieu bieu cho toan tinh tan cong. Thilc ra chi
diing mot ni^a. Tvf the n^y con tieu bieu viec lo Doi may co lai va giiicfng cao, tao nen nep
toan bao ve mat k h i tnic dien vdi sil phan cong nhan giiJa may.
v^ t i m each ph6ng ngii can thiet. Ham y nhii sau :
38 39
- Buon phien itu uat - Mau sac
Neu khong phai do dau ddn benh tat, thi Mau sac cua mui i t bien doi. Ngoai chiu tac
G ^ c chan 1^ c6 ifu tif buon biic trong long. d6ng bcli nhiet dp ben ngoai (nhif nong lanh
kfch thich khien mtii bi do), khi mui c6 mku
may hdn h5
trang bech, c6 ham y ra sao ?
Doi mky lay dong, giildng len ha xuong. La
Tam trang cdng thdng
dpng tac d i l n x a nhanh chong, neu khong quan
sat ky se kho phat hien. Mot so ngifcJi k h i c6 tam trang cang thang,
hoac chuan bi ra mot quyet dinh quan trong gi
Ham y nhvf sau .
d6, CO thay doi ve mau mui, mui trd nen trang
Tam trang phan chan\^ bech. Dieu ay noi len tam trang lo sd ngap
ngCfng.
Khi nhan diWc tin phan khdi, se c6 tif the
nhii vay, c6n goi la rang rd net m ^ . Do dit
Neu doi phifPng la khach hang cua ban, sii
3. Ham y tdm ly v d tmh each cua i?iui :
\ thay doi do cho thay anh ay dang trong tam
Mui CO ft dong tac, nhifng d^ng ve lai da trang do dit thieu diJt khodt.
dang nhat trong cac cd quan tren khuon mat. Lbng tit trong bi ton thiicfng
Nhxl vay, mui c6 tac dung nhif the nao trong
Doi liic vi long tif trong bi ton thildng, trong
t i m hieu giao tiep vdi moi ngiidi ? Lam the nao
long day ngd vifc, pha chiit cam giac tpi 16i va
thong qua sii thay doi nho nhoi cua mui va
quan sat diidc tam trang doi phifdng ? bat an, mau mui ciing trb nen trang bech.
- Nof mui
Mui phan anh tam trang con ngilcfi ra sao ?
Theo phan tfch khoa hoc, thi c6 cac bieu hien That ra 1^ md canh m u i , do hdi thcl phap
nhii sau : phong tao nen.
40 41
nguon tai.lieu . vn